From the Blogabout me

What I believe?

Most people have strong looks on life, politics, religion, iPhone vs Android, and pizza. Beliefs of all types mold who you are, and who you will become. Beliefs are just like opinions in that there is no right or wrong belief, but it is great to explore yours from time to time. I as well have my own beliefs, and thought it would be worthwhile to share a few of my own beliefs.

 

Everyone has something to bring to the table; listen.

Maya Angelou - When you learn, teach. When you get, giveWe are all unique, with special skills and talents. When everyone gets a voice, and others listen, great things can happen. Some times you won’t be heard and you may get frustrated, but we cannot control what others are doing. Instead of shutting down, listen to them and offer advice.  Over time, your advice might be heard. If this becomes the case, those people will hear you more often.

Recently when Maya Angelou passed away, I couldn’t help to think about a quote she once said:

When you learn, teach. When you get, give. – Maya Angelou

We are all teachers.

I can usually learn something new from every person I encounter. I believe that everyone has the ability to teach something new to someone else. I love it when that happens, and watching it happen for others. If you are not learning from others, you are not paying enough attention to those around you. Keep an open head and heart, you will learn.

The direction which education starts a man will determine his future life - PlatoI believe in lifelong learning.

Learning continues throughout a lifetime. I love the quote:

“I’d rather know some of the questions than all of the answers.” – James Thurber

What you see is what you get.

I don’t like pretending. I will strive to put myself out there in the most honest, transparent way possible. Even if it’s not the most popular method. And I tend to gravitate toward people who share the same philosophy.

Cooperation beats competition every time.

Exciting stuff happens when we pool our talents together. I love sharing back and forth with my colleagues who are in the same industry. We all have different skills and backgrounds, but putting those different talents together make amazing things happen.

A sense of humor will get you through almost anything.

Laughter need not be cut out of anything, since it improves everything.  - James ThurberLaughing—at myself and at the weird stuff life which can be thrown into my life sometimes is the only way to make it through the times. Laughter is good for the soul, and feels good.  Take advantage of it, and use it often.

It is better to look for what we have in common than what divides us.

I won’t go near the political discussions on social media because I truly believe that it builds walls, because I would rather be a bridge for getting people together. For years I would help others find their own bridges, but I built walls around myself and didn’t really understand. Finally I discovered it was because I was insecure and afraid what would happen if those walls came down.  Over the last few years, I’ve let many of those walls down and opened up more. It feels wonderful, and I wish others would try it more often.

Don’t try to find the division between each other, even though it is extremely easy to do so. Take a little time and effort and see what you have in common with your neighbor, it will be worth it.

People are basically good.

I have found that most people are honest, kind and wanting to do the right thing. If I go into this expectation when meeting a new person, I am rarely disappointed.

 

 

Go. Explore. Learn.

 

Your mindset – Eating Soup With A Fork…

For years my mindset was to be a very negative person, carried lots of baggage, and just threw pity parties for myself for the heck of it.  But in the last few years I really started thinking about my mindset, and how it has affected the rest of my life choices.

So when you hear this phrase, do you think negatively or positivity:

Eating Soup With A Fork…

 

When you wake up in the morning you get to choose your very own mindset every day. Think about that for a second.  That is an amazing power to hold. So what do you chose to do?

  • Start the day with a positive outlook, or do you
  • Start the day with a negative outlook

It’s so easy to start with negative thoughts:

Gosh, another day of work.

It’s only Wednesday!

It’s raining/too cold/too hot outside

It’s just so easy to do that, and I’ve done it so many times.  But what if just for a month, you woke up and found something positive to say? Every November, I see so many people post things they are grateful for building up to Thanksgiving and I see so many people find good things to say, and less negative vibes. Why don’t we do that every month, every day? Is it so hard? Now, let’s face it. Some days it will be hard and you will have to dig for something to be grateful for, but try it. You will find something to be grateful for each and every day. A good attitude doesn’t just happen, you have to work at it.


The above video was recorded a while back and really states a point that I feel too many people forget. There are so many approaches and possibilities we have each and every day.  Some which you can control while others you cannot. Keep positive as much as you can. You have to be happy with what you have and where you are at now or you will never reach where you want to be.

Think about it this way = We can’t control the weather or control others, so why complain about it.  Instead, go with the flow with these factors and find a way to make it work.  If you go through life just being happy when things are going your way, you will find that life does not go your way often.  Instead, if you go through life finding things to be grateful for, life will go your way much more often.

Seriously – Set your tone for your day, and life. Try it, what do you have to lose? You can make the choice today and do one of the following:

  • Go out expecting problems & people not treating you nice, you will get your wish.
  • Go out expecting people to be good to you. If it doesn’t happen, keep a smile on your face and go with the flow. Something will happen even better. Maybe not today, but it will happen.

 

I’ve heard this type of mindset similar to faith.

You have to believe it before you see it

 

When bad things or people come into your life, realize it’s just part of the plan. One good break can make up for all of those bad-breaks in the past. You have the choice to look for those breaks!

Do you see beauty or do you see prickly?

prick-beauty


Being negative is a lot of work, and draining to your body

Your life follows your thoughts. If you think

“this is not going to go my way”  = no problem, it won’t

“I’ll never meet the right person” = that only draws in loneliness

“I hate my job” = only draws negativity to your workspace, which effects your performance

“I’ll never do that” = you’re right, it’s only going to draw in mediocrity

Go out keeping your mind focused on the good thoughts, makes your mind too full for the discouraging thoughts

Years back, I didn’t like the way Olive Garden’s cheesecake tasted. Instead of complaining, I went home and learned to make them, and they are better than any manufacturing company can make.

I also didn’t think have confidence that I was good at DIY’s like woodworking or making things with my hands and was afraid to start any project. But then I told myself it couldn’t be that hard, so I learned to make candles and soap, next building small things with my hands, and now I am not afraid (too much) about what I can carry out with the right tools. Challenge me!
I also believe that in many cases, your body will not get well until your brain gets well.
For me, I think a good part of my health over the years has played a role in my mental health. I feared so long that seizures would affect me and always focused on them. I told myself one day that I wouldn’t let them control me or who I am, and it’s been over 6 months since my last seizure.

Give yourself permission to be happy

This is going to be a good day!

 


So, instead of thinking that

“Eating Soup With A Fork” as impossible and as negative as possible,

Think about “Eating Soup With A Fork” positively, in which you can never can get enough.

 

*I originally posted the article Eating Soup With A Fork in 2010, and have been so grateful of my relative who had such great wisdom. I read that journal entry she wrote for a reason; I am sure of it…

 

 

 

 

 

St. Valentine – The untold story.

When you hear “St. Valentine” what do you think about? Flowers? Balloons? Stuffed animals & chocolate? February 14th? Satan’s day (for singles)? My guess is – “yes of course.” (at least for one of these) What if I told you there is much more to St. Valentine that chocolate covered strawberries and cupid flying around shooting arrows into young love birds?

So before you read any further, ask your question:

What would you advocate for?

Share your thoughts in the comments area below.

Quick historic facts about St. Valentine, himself:

As a Roman priest around 250+/- AD, St. Valentine did not think it was a good idea for young couples to get married. See back then, the “traditional” way of marriage was to have Polygamy partnerships. Thus, he believed young soldiers who got married would be terrible on the battlefield because they might be too caught up thinking about lots of lady-lovin’ back at home, instead of being focused and effective enough out in the field. Okay, that sounds pretty reasonable if you ask me; lots of lady-lovin’ is not such a bad thing. So instead of leaving too many hotties back home, he (Valentine) was determined to have people do this whole “one man & one woman committed relationship”, which was a sin! He would marry people in secret. Oops, that turned out to be not a good idea. So the Emperor imprisoned Valentine for these acts, but then for a few reasons the same Emperor started liking Valentine. But when Valentine made the mistake to try to convert the Emperor to wanting everybody to have a 2 person marriage, it was the bottom-line… So that was the last act for Valentine. He was beaten with clubs, stoned, and beheaded on February 14th, around 270.

All because he wanted people to marry single spouses…  Dang him!
Pretty romantic so far, right?

Since St. Valentine has been well-known for wanting to make marriages set to a couple, instead of a polygamy partnership, he is known as the patron for engaged couples, happy marriages, and lovers.

 


Ok so there was the history lesson, get to the point Kevin… Have you continued to think about what I asked about earlier?  

What would you advocate for?

Do you love something so much that you would stand up for it, no manner what?  Some people say they would stand up for their children, their partner, their religious beliefs, their pets, or maybe something else altogether. But would you stand up for what you believe in? I mean, here is a guy who stood up for couples who wanted to be happy and go against the government (i.e., the Church) and do what they felt was right.  Go against traditional marriage and join in a partnership with the one other person they loved.

Isn’t that what we all ask for today? Is that such a big thing to ask for?

I want to say there are things I would advocate for so much that I would be willing to die for them, but I think when it comes down to it, there are probably only 2 or 3 things that I would feel that way for.  Look inside of yourself, and think about that about yourself.  Look deep inside.

If you find there are not things, I don’t think that is a bad thing.

If you find there are things though, really think about them and why you feel that way. Do you show that in your daily life? If not, why not???

Share your thoughts in the comments area below; what / who would die for?

Additional History Lesson – Extra spin for those who read this far:

Did you know St. Valentine is also known as a Patron for many things other things? The one that really hits home for me – Patron of epileptics. The name “Valentine” and the German word for “fallen,” which is gefallenen, as it’s pronunciation sounds like “Valentine.”  So I guess when you have “fallen” in love for St. Valentine’s Day, you might want to think again what you are implying…

 

< Research credit: Epilepsy UK >
< Sense of humor credit: me >

 

When did we make the wrong turn?

Have you ever been told, “Love your neighbors and enemies.”  Sure you have.
Its the Golden Rule, who hasn’t been told that since they were 2 years old?

Question to ponder though- is that the best message and advice to give some one from day one in this world?
Maybe we should look at it more like the way we learn in school.  Let me explain…

When we first start in school, we learn the basics, generalized, and fundamentals of life as a whole.
2+2 = 4
A,B,C,D
Cursive
We do not start 1st grade learning Calculus theorems, chemical equations, and the meaning of life…  So are we taught incorrectly with “love your enemy?”

Maybe it should be something more like this…

In our youth – “Love our family.”
Teenage years – “Love our friends.”
College level – “Love all those who love us.”
Higher level – “Love those who are different than us, politics, looks, race, sexual orientation, etc..”
Post-Grad – “Love our neighbors”
PhD level – “Love our enemies”

Where and When did we make the wrong turn?

Maybe that could help us all out…

Your thoughts???

Better hold on

Have you ever noticed

  • Those who feel entitled in life, are the ones who are most unworthy
  • Those who reserve themselves and do not expect things for free, are those who are so desirable

Recently I have been introduced to a number of individuals.

Intelligent,
Mindful of others,
Wise,
Thoughtful,
Sincere

And the best part – they are completely humble and act as if they have not done anything special.

Those people that want to spend time with you, for no other reason than just to hang out. No other motives…

That’s something special and you better hold on.

wish people tried harder…

Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they’re trying to find someone who’s going to make them feel good.

Do not ever give somebody that much power over you.  You and you alone are the only person who should make you feel good about yourself.  If you can’t rely on yourself to remind yourself how great you are, why would you expect others to do the same?

This comes in friendships, intimate, and co-worker relationships.

 

In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you see your relationship as a place that you go to give, and not…… a place that you go to take.~Anthony Robbins

Better Have a Green Thumb w/ Relationships…

The obvious: Relationships are too much like a garden. Beautiful and enchanting to look at, but you must maintain the flowers and prune the weeds, while small, or they will overtake its beauty. You must always be willing to work at it, and treat it with respect, and it will continue to take your breath away.

Not so obvious: Some times you need a few piles of cow crap before blooms start again.

 

(from my 2009 article at 4-evercaptured.com)